1. Success Starts With Ownership

Athletes must take responsibility for their progress. Here’s how:

• Set your own goals. It’s not about what your coach or parent wants; it’s about what you want to achieve.

• Show up when no one’s watching. The true measure of drive is what you do outside of organized training sessions.

• Take accountability. Whether you miss a practice or crush a workout, recognize how your actions affect your progress.

2. Coaches and Parents Are Guides, Not Drivers

Parents and coaches play a crucial role, but they aren’t in control of the wheel. Here’s how to be supportive:

• Ask open-ended questions. Encourage athletes to reflect on their goals and weaknesses. Questions like, “What do you love most about this sport?” or “What’s one thing you want to improve?” foster critical thinking.

• Focus on effort over results. Praise work ethic, resilience, and dedication rather than stats or wins—especially for younger athletes.

• Teach accountability. Let athletes experience the consequences of their actions. If they skip warm-ups and have a bad practice, it’s a learning opportunity.

3. Look for Signs They’re Ready to Take the Lead

How do you know an athlete is ready to take ownership? Look for these indicators:

• They put in extra work without being told.

• They take responsibility for their mistakes.

• They are consistent in their efforts.

These are clear signs they’re starting to take charge of their journey.

4. Celebrate the Journey, Not Just the Destination

As much as we want our athletes to achieve their goals, the process matters more. Why? Because sports don’t last forever, but the lessons and relationships do.

• Encourage athletes to enjoy the experiences, friendships, and opportunities they gain along the way.

• Foster a growth mindset. Celebrate effort, learning, and curiosity, not just results.

5. The Dangers of Wanting It More Than They Do

When parents and coaches over-invest in an athlete’s success, it can lead to:

• Burnout. Signs include lethargy, lack of enthusiasm, or even early signs of depression.

• Dependency. Athletes may become reliant on being told what to do instead of finding solutions themselves.

• Damaged relationships. Over-pushing can create resentment between athletes and their parents or coaches.

Ultimately, our role as parents and coaches is to guide, inspire, and support—not to take over. This is their journey.

Final Thoughts

Ask yourself: “Am I doing this for them, or am I trying to live through them?” It’s a tough question, but an important one.

When athletes truly want it for themselves, you’ll see it in their actions, not just their words. Step back, trust them to take the wheel, and support them as they grow—not just as athletes, but as people.

Thanks for being part of the EGM Weekly community. Stay tuned for next week, where I’ll share updates on EGM Labs and more insights to help athletes thrive.

Until then, go out there, have fun, and enjoy the game!

All the best,

Dr. Jamie Phillips

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